Someone's Hair is Growing Longer
by TheNextAliceOwO
Summary: Haruhi's dad goes on vacation, forcing her to stay with Hikaru for a month. Meanwhile, Kyouya and Kaoru notice something going on between the two. Rated T for some sexual content, jealousy, George W. Bush, sons of muffins, and a fake advisory warning
1. Chapter 1

Did you know slinkies are addicting? I just got one and whenever I am near it, I am just compelled to play with it!

DISCLAIMER: I do NOT own Ouran High School Host Club in any way, shape, or form!

--

_Kyouya was intently absorbed in whatever he was doing on his laptop. Whether it be solitaire or actual work, no one knows, but he was concentrating closely._

_It's a wonder how he can concentrate in the room. After closing time, the Host Club was always in chaos. Hikaru and Kaoru were playing with Haruhi, Tamaki was worrying about his "daughter," and Hunny-senpai was repeatedly trying to feed tea to his bunny. Only Mori-senpai was quiet._

_Kyouya took a short break from whatever he was doing and stretched his arms back. His glasses flashed as he glanced toward Hikaru and Haruhi. Kaoru was just standing back, probably observing something or thinking about some philosophy. He watched as Hikaru whispered something into Haruhi's ear. Haruhi's face turned bright red and she hit Hikaru (not to hard) on the head and scolded him. Kyouya caught Kaoru smiling a little._

_Then, Kyouya noticed something, though usually a person like him wouldn't notice something like this. Kyouya observed Haruhi for a moment and sighed._

"_It looks like our little girl is growing up," he said and he spotted Kaoru walking over to him._

--

"A MONTH?!"

Haruhi stared at her in disbelief. She didn't know what he was so surprised about.

"What? Did we miss something?" Hikaru asked as he and Kaoru pushed through the double-doors.

Haruhi sighed and prepared to explain what happened.

"Well…"

--

"_The whole summer?" Haruhi asked._

"_No! Just a month!" Ranka said. "I guess you can say it's a business trip…"_

"_Really…" Haruhi was deep in thought._

"_But I won't go if you don't want me to!" he added quickly. "After all, Misuzu and Mei are not at the pension, right?"_

"_No!" Haruhi said firmly. "I'll find someone to stay with… Or I can just stay home alone."_

"_NO WAY!" Ranka said loudly. "I am not letting my daughter stay home and get kidnapped by some freak!"_

"_I'm not going to get kidnapped…"_

"_Just stay with anyone! Even those boys at the host club!" Ranka said. "After all, they are pretty reliable." Ranka was still hoping. Haruhi wasn't that type of girl anyway, though._

"_When are you leaving?"_

"_Next weekend."_

--

"And yeah…" Haruhi ended her recount on what happened.

Hunny-senpai and Mori-senpai looked a little guilty.

"_Gomen_, Haru-chan," Hunny started. "_Demo_, Mori and I are going to the States for training."

Haruhi looked at Hunny-senpai, who started tearing. "Ahh! No! It's okay!" Haruhi said quickly. "I'll just find someone else!"

"Ah… Well, my grandmother finally let me go to France to visit my mother…" Tamaki said. "So Kyouya and I are going to France this summer."

"Oh…"

Everyone stared at Hikaru and Kaoru. "I'm going with Tono and Kyouya!" Kaoru said quickly.

"_What?!_" This was absolutely new to Hikaru and Tamaki, however Kyouya was not surprised.

"Ah, yes…" Kyouya pushed up his glasses. "Did I not tell you? I invited Kaoru yesterday…"

Hikaru put his hands behind his head. "Well, I guess you can stay with be, but you might get lost like you did last time in the mansion, and it's only gonna be you and me… Everyone's on vacation."

Haruhi remembered the last time she went to the Hitachiin Mansion. It took her an hour to get to the kitchen from Hikaru and Kaoru's bedroom. Or maybe that was because she got lost…

"But on second thought…" Hikaru smiled mischieviously. "I've never lived in a commoner's home before…"

--

A/N: And that's chapter 1! Sorry if the characters were a little OOC…

PLEASE REVIEW! PRETTY PLEASEEEE WITH A SPRINKLES ON TOP???? REVIEWS MAKE THE AUTHOR WRITE BETTER!


	2. Chapter 2

I was really surprised when I checked my e-mail this morning: I got like 13 messages from Fanfic about this story… I was really surprised…

--

"Okay, so don't let any strangers inside the house," Ranka warned as he stepped out the door.

"Uh huh," Haruhi said.

"And don't do anything stupid."

"I don't do stupid things!"

"And take care of yourself! You know what happens when you get sick!"

"Okay, okay!" Haruhi pushed Ranka out the door. "Don't worry! Just enjoy yourself!"

Ranka sighed. "Okay, don't strain yourself."

Haruhi smiled as Ranka closed the door behind him. She glanced quickly at the clock.

_Shoot, Hikaru should be here any moment now_. Haruhi felt strangely nervous and shook her head.

_Just relax, it's only a friend staying at another friend's house for a m-month._ Haruhi had just recently realized her feelings for Hikaru. It took Mei an extremely long time to nail it into her head.

She walked into her dad's bedroom to clean up, after all, this was where Hikaru was staying.

_Ding dong!_ Haruhi jumped a little at the sudden noise.

"Coming!" Haruhi said, putting away the last of her dad's stuff into his dresser drawers.

She opened the door and there he was, in *ahem* "commoner's" clothes, which actually suited him pretty nicely. He had two bags (much to Haruhi's surprise).

"Hi, Hikaru," Haruhi said. "Come in."

She escorted him to her dad's room. "Thanks for staying," she said as they walked through the apartment. "I really appreciate it."

"No big deal," he muttered.

"So anyway," she continued. "You'll be staying in my dad's room."

"Aww… Really?" Hikaru said playfully, a smile of childishness creeping upon his face.

Haruhi looked up at him. "What?"

"I thought I could sleep in your bed."

"What?!"

"Well, it's awfully lonely since Kaoru's not here."

"Heck no!"

"Please?"

"_Iie!_"

"Pretty please?"

"_Iie!_" Haruhi persisted. This continued for a while, until Hikaru pulled out his secret weapon of destruction. Or it was for now.

"Fine," he sighed. "Then I'll just leave." He turned around.

"Fine! Geez!" Haruhi said. "But you're not sleeping in my bed! You're sleeping on the floor!"

"What?!"

"You heard me!"

And it was all settled after that, but by that time it was already lunch. After all, they were both pretty stubborn.

Haruhi stretched out her arms. "So, what do you want for dinner?"

"What?" Hikaru asked. Usually he wasn't asked this type of question: he just ate whatever the chef cooked up for him.

"What do you want for dinner?"

"I want…" Hikaru paused, about to order something totally complicated, but realizing that commoners don't cook that type of food. "Hey, what does an _onigiri_ taste like?"

"_Onigiri_?" Haruhi raised her eyebrows at him. "You never had an onigiri before?"

"Nope."

"Okay then!" Haruhi put on a satisfied smile. "_Onigiri_ it is!"

--

Kyouya and Kaoru sat comfortably on a couch infront of a blank TV set. Infront of them was a speaker phone.

"Are you sure you connected the cameras?" Kaoru said to the phone.

"I'm positive!" Mei said. "Wait, gimme a sec."

All of a sudden, six diffent shots flickered onto the humogous TV set.

"Did it work?" Mei asked.

"Yeah!" Kaoru said. He took the remote and started searching through the shots individually.

Kyouya pushed up his glasses. "Just out of curiosity, Mei. How did you get the cameras into Haruhi's home?"

"Well…"

--

"_Mei?"_

"_Hi! Just thought I'd come over for a visit!"_

"_No offense, but you kinda came at the wrong time. I'm doing my homework right now."_

"_Don't worry about it! I just want to get away from my father to make some clothes." Mei said as she put down her large bag._

"_Oh, okay." Haruhi dismissed herself into her room to work on homework._

_Mei took out six cameras and put them up, and hid them. One in the kitchen, one in the livingroom, one in the hallway, and in every other place she could. She was left with one of the six cameras. She snuck into Haruhi's room._

_Haruhi was hard at work, concentrating only on the problems on the sheet of paper._

"_Haruhi?" Mei said. No answer_

"_There's a spider crawling up your back."_

_No answer_

"_THERE'S A COMET COMING RIGHT THIS WAY!"_

_No answer._

"_I WAS COOKING SOMETHING AND THE KITCHEN'S ON FIRE!"_

_Again, no answer._

_Mei was able to put up a camera._

--

So, what did you think?

PLEASE REVIEW! IF I GET ENOUGH REVIEWS, I WILL UPDATE!

Did anyone notice that I changed my name? o.0

So yeah… Review, or Hikaru will come to your house with a water gun!


	3. Chapter 3

_**A.N:**_ WOO HOO CHAPTER 3!!!

Sorry I haven't been updating recently, cuz I'm obsessed with Soul Eater and I'm trying to get one of my stories in a magazine… Oh yeah, excuse any misspelled junk cuz misspelling is sometimes my style x3 oh yes and grammar mistakes... sooo enjoy ^^

DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN OHSHC!!! If I did, then Hikaru and Haruhi would've had grandchildren by now o.0

--

"Are you okay, Haruhi?"

_Sneeze_. "I'm fine," _sneeze_. "I just have a small cold, that's all."

Hikaru raised his eyebrows. "Are you sure? You look sorta pale…"

"Don't," Haruhi sneezed, "worry. Just make me some tea and I'll be fine before you know *sneeze* it."

"Okay…" Hikaru said, walking toward the window and closing the curtains as rain started to fall hard onto the apartment.

--

"HOLY SHIT!" Hikaru screamed as he tried to douse the flame that formed on the stove a.k.a "Haruhi's tea."

A pale Haruhi ran into the kitchen. "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO?!"

"Turn on the stove," Hikaru said.

"Okay, uhhhh…" Haruhi examined the apartment as fast as she could, her eyes trailing over rooms, the little furniture she had, and a fire extinguisher. Perfect.

--

_Meanwhile_…

Kyouya, Kaoru, and a newly-arrived Mei stared at the screen, where they saw a panicking Hikaru trying to cool off a fire. Suddenly Haruhi came with the fire extinguisher and doused the fire.

"Maybe we should've told Haruhi that Hikaru burned down the last two mansions he tried to cook in?" Kaoru said.

Mei raised her eyebrows at him. "Didn't you say you burned down one of those, too?"

"Yeah, but it was mostly Hikaru's fault," Kaoru defended himself. "I told him not to turn it to 600 degrees."

--

Hikaru sat next to the sleeping Haruhi. He was bored and his toy was sleeping… Now, all he could do was listen to the loud rain and thunder.

Wait, thunder? Hikaru looked out the window. Sure enough, there was the flash of lightning and the loud crack of thunder. He worriedly glanced at Haruhi. Good, she can't hear it.

Suddenly, Haruhi jerked up like those zombies he saw in that one movie he watched on with the rest of the Host Club when Tamaki had nightmares for about three weeks.

_**KRAKKA BOOM!**_

The thunder roared and Hikaru didn't see any reaction from Haruhi.

"Oi, Haruhi? Are you okay?"

"Hikaru…" Haruhi's face was hidden in her face.

"Y-yes?"

"I LOVE YOU!" Haruhi's face perked up and started attacking Hikaru.

"_NANI?!_"

_Meanwhile…_

"…"

"Well," Kyouya said, pushing his glasses up. "That was unexpected."

Mei and Kaoru said nothing as they watched Haruhi chase Hikaru all over the place, causing a table to tilt and a small explosion.

The door opened, and a blonde idiot that Hikaru and Kaoru call "tono" came in.

"Kyouya I-" Tamaki's face froze when he saw the screen.

"Holy shit," Kaoru said.

"T-they went _chu_," Mei managed to utter.

Tamaki started running back and forth in the room yelling something along the lines of "NOO HARUHI?! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO _OTOU-SAN_?!"

Kaoru and Mei started jumping up and down excitedly saying something about being proud? Jeez, you'd think they were parents or something…

But something like that didn't distract Kyouya, he was thinking about something else. It's not like the can stop horomones or puberty or whatever… He knows, Tamaki tried: didn't turn out too well.

Kyouya was deep in thought. _Well, we could always-_

"NOO HARUHI!!!" a frantic Tamaki continued running back and forth.

_Or we could-_

"THEY KISSED THEY KISSED!" Mei was still jumping up and down.

_Wait, didn't I just say-_

"Hikaru is growing up so fast," Kaoru wiped a tear from his eye.

_Okay again, we could-_

"…HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO _OTOU-SAN?!_"

"SHUT THE F*** UP!" Kyouya yelled to them. They all froze, even Mei, who was in mid-jump.

"I think I finally found a solution, Kaoru," Kyouya said, finally looking up at the screen, which now showed a passed out Hikaru and Haruhi. Hikaru, from the kiss, and Haruhi because she was sick anyway.

"But it's going to take a lot of work, convincing acts, a new uniform proposal, hair extensions, and…" Kyouya paused. "Ah yes, make-up… Lots and lots of make-up"

--

_**A/N:**_ Wow that was kinda hard to write… But yea ^^ Sorry for the late update -.-" I'll try to update more often… But did anyone notice I changed my name… Again? XD I get tired of usernames to easily…

Well, you know the drill, review or I will send Tamaki over in a tutu o.O


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N:**_ OH EM GEE HAIIII x333

YAYZ update x333 well… I dun really have a lot 2 say… Erm… 'Kay then…

DISCLAIMEY: IS NOT THE CREATOR

--

"Ughhh…" Haruhi's head was spinning. Her eyes remained closed and she felt her forehead. It felt like her temperature had gone down a little._ Is this what a hangover feels like?_ She asked herslef. But she was pretty sure she didn't drink. After all, the last time she drank, she spit it out in disgust and said that she would never drink something like that again.

Haruhi turned over to her side and opened her eyes slightly. She was greeted by a farmiliar face with orange hair…

It took Haruhi's tired mind about… 10 seconds? To realize a very important fact… That orange hair was Hikaru.

Haruhi lept up from her sleeping position and stared at the sleeping boy. Hikaru was just outside her futon (FYI, 4 those that don't know, a futon is kinda like a mattress… Only it's lower… Actually ask someone else xP).

_Good,_ Haruhi thought in her mind. She calmed down a bit and sat on the futon. There was no point in sleeping once she got up. Haruhi stared at Hikaru: his smooth-looking hair, the way he looks when he's asleep….

Haruhi reached her hand out toward him. Then, Hikaru suddenly opened his eyes.

"Haruhi, that's a bit stalker-ish," Hikaru teased.

Haruhi's hand jerked back and her face turned a little red. "Well, sorry!" she got up. "I'll go make some breakfast."

Hikaru stretched. "That sounds good."

--

"Hey, Hikaru…"

"Hmm?" Hikaru leaned back and looked over his shoulder.

"Did you have a package delivered?" Haruhi brought in a cardboard box that didn't seem too heavy. She closed the apartment door to her leg and walked over. "You know, it's a hassle when you use the 'commoner postal service' like this…"

Hikaru wiped a fake tear from his eye. "How could you accuse me of such a thing?" he watched as Haruhi put the package on the floor infront of him. "No, but what is it?"

" 'To Fujioka Haruhi,'" Haruhi read on the label.

"Ooooo!" Hikaru's hand flung up into the air. "Pick me!!!"

"…Hikaru?"

"Can I open it?"

"Sure…"

"Okay…" Hikaru took a deep breath. He rubbed his hands together. Then he closed his eyes and put his hands on top of the box. "…Open sesame!"

"…No, Hikaru…."

-One opening of the package later-

"What's this?" Hikaru picked up two of the contents in the box. "A wig?"

"Look, there's a card…" Haruhi picked up the said item.

(_**Quick A/N:**_ OKAYYYY just to let you guys know: _Kyouya_//**Kaoru**//Mei//Tamaki)

_Dear Haruhi,_

_Unfortunately for Tamaki, you are a growing woman and won't stay his little girl forever._

NOOOOO HARUHIIII!!!!!

**Shut up, tono!!!**

…HARUHI HELP MEEE I'M STUCK WITH THESE IDIOTS!

_Shut up, retards! Anyway, *cough* you are now permitted to wear this new Ouran uniform._

**Designed by mom =D**

_And the brown wig in the package. You will now be attending Ouran as a girl. Do not worry, you will still be working in the host club._

"Oh, joy," Haruhi said sarcastically.

_And you will no longer be entertaining the female students of the school, for we are know opening the host club to male students._

HARUHI! DADDY HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS!!!

_Sincerely, Kyouya_ **and Kaoru** and Mei and DADDY 3

--

"…" Haruhi sighed. She stared down at the letter. "Why do I hang out with these people?"

Meanwhile, Hikaru's world just came crashing down… and down… and down… because nobody knows where the universe ends…

--

_**A/N:**_ NOOO WHERE IS THE HUMOR??? I'm sorry for this sucky chappy . the next one will be better because… THEY ARE GOING BACK TO SCHOOL =D and all the drama happens OwO and the perviness *cough* Hikaru *cough*

Review plz ^^ I don't blame u if u don't… it was a bad chappy…

OH BUT ONE THINGGG hu do u think is better? Hikaru or Kaoru? My friend and I had an argument xP


	5. Chapter 5

_**A/N:**_ OH EM GEE I am starting high school soon o.0 I AM SCURED Cuz I have 2 work hard… And I know the people who work hard will suceed and stuff, but math isn't my thing…

Anywho, I'm going to try as hard as I can to update all my fanfics before Monday!!!! It's not gonna happen. But I'll do as many as I can! (AKA one fanfic… I chose you guys xD) X3 so yah Just to let you know, this is a NEW SCENE as in no more stuff at Haruhi's place (sorry I was stuck…) But I tried as hard as I can! I even watched a bunch of AMVs just to research xD I found some interesting ones though,,, (Ouran Musical: High School Musical 2 xP Youtube!!! Look it up xD I normally don't like HSM, but this is hilarious xD Ohh and Haruhi the Unicorn xP If you see a comment that said "I thought that Tamaki would be the leoploridon" or something… That's me xD)

Enjoy~

DISCLAIMER: If I owned Ouran… I already went through this didn't I?

--

Hikaru was a little wierded out after that experience. He felt just a _little_ awkward (and by little, I mean very) awkward around Haruhi after that, but it's not like she remembered. For some reason, that made him kinda sad, but still. She was not in the right mind. So it shouldn't matter.

But it did.

And what mattered even more, was that the next day, Hikaru saw a bunch of the girls wearing new uniforms that are kind of like the ones in commoner schools, but it was better than the long dresses they wore. Then, Haruhi came in. Hikaru almost died right then and there.

Normally, someone wouldn't recognize her as Haruhi, but Hikaru knew she was actually a girl. She was wearing a brown wig (very much like her real hair) with cute, long pigtails and the girls uniform. Almost at once, a kazillion boys ran toward her. So Hikaru took a bat out of nowhere and started making his way (violently) toward Haruhi.

"GAH HARUHI!" Hikaru took a gasp for breath as he finally got out of the sea of boys trying to ask out Haruhi. "You're seriously wearing that uniform?"

"Yeah," Haruhi dusted off her skirt. "I don't want Kyouya to increase my debt or something. It's best to just wear it."

Hikaru had to agree with her. Kyouya was kinda scary if you didn't listen to him… Hikaru should know, he's been through it.

Hikaru still felt really weird though. It wasn't everyday you see Haruhi in such a cute outfit, That was when Hikaru's mind started to wander into lands that Haruhi would find perverted.

"Wait," a male voice suddenly snapped Hikaru (grudgingly) back to reality. "Did he just say _Haruhi?_"

"You mean, Fujioka Haruhi of the host club?"

"What other Haruhis do you know?"

Suddenly, everyone was talking about that subject, because let's face it: Rumors travel like a wild fire (_**A/N:**_ I should know xD).

"Haruhi-kun's a cross-dresser?"

"Fujioka got a sex change?"

"Haruhi's really a girl?"

"There you go," Kyouya came up to the person who said the last comment. "That is correct. Fujioka Haruhi is a female.

--

Believe it or not, it actually wasn't as big of a commotion as Haruhi thought it would be. Apparently, the students an Ouran accept things pretty easily (by pretty, I mean very). But she's not complaining. It makes it easier to deal with school. Though, she had to admit, it was kinda weird when the girls stopped calling her "Haruhi-kun" and started with either "Fujioka-san" or "Haruhi-chan." And the guys stopped calling her plain "Fujioka," and started calling her "Haruhi-chan" or "Haruhi" on occasions, but at least the ol' "Fujioka-san" stuck around.

In fact the school adjusted so quickly that immediately when she came into the host club, Kyouya told her that she had plenty of male customers (plenty means 50 plus).

"You know how to be a male host," Kyouya said. "Now try being a female host. It shouldn't be that hard. Just act like a girl more."

Haruhi flipped a pigtail over her shoulder. It has been bugging her for the past 10 minutes. "Shouldn't be a problem."

"HARUHI!!! _OTOU-SAN _DIDN'T WANT THIS TO HAPPEN!!!" Tamaki came from out of nowhere and strangled Haruhi.

"Yes, Senpai," Haruhi managed to choke out. "I accomplished that the last 18 times you said it."

When Tamaki finally let go (which, by the way, took lots and lots of prying and kicking and a bat), Kyouya gave Haruhi her appointment schedule.

"By the looks of it," Kyouya said, pushing up his glasses, "it looks like you may be able to pay your debt early since all these guys are making appointments on the first day." Of course, that perked up Haruhi a little.

Hikaru on the other hand, wasn't so thrilled. He definitely wasn't a huge fan of a bunch of guys fawning over Haruhi, trying to get a date with her. Not like he's gonna tell Haruhi that though.

"Don't worry about it, _tono_," Hikaru said, leaning back in his chair. "It's not like Haruhi will get a lot of customers anyway. She can't act like a girl.'  
Normally, Haruhi wasn't the type to get mad at a comment like that, but this would be like Hikaru wasn't considering her a girl.

"Yeah, right!" Haruhi said, totally changing her natural personality. "I bet you I could get more appointments than you can!" At that moment, Haruhi really wanted to slap herself back to normal

Hikaru turned around. "What's this? Haruhi is challenging _me?_ The king of challenges?"

"I'm the king of the host club =D"

"Shut up, _tono_," Hikaru turned toward Kaoru, who was just watching next to him while Tamaki broke down in tears. "You in Kaoru?"

Kaoru shrugged. "I'm in if you're in."

Hunny smiled. "Usa-chan thinks it's gonna be fun, too!"

Mori nodded.

Tamaki cried a river and almost drowned the state of Alaska.

Kyouya pushed up his glasses and continued typing. He paused for a moment and covered his right ear.

"Did you get that?"

"YES!" Mei's voice said into Kyouya's ear. "Our plan is taking off smoothly… Tell Kaoru I said hi =D."

Kaoru covered his ears. "I'm right here!" he whispered.

"Ohhh…" There was a short silence. "Sorry xD"

--

_**A/N:**_ Sooo how'd it go? You like? I got a comment about this, but I'm thinking about doing KaoruxMei for some reason xD Of course, it's not an actual, but w/e xP Now how the heck am I gonna do that? o.0

By the way, the magazine rejected my story ='( But yeah… It wasn't really something I was really proud of anyway, way too short xP

Wish me luck in high school! 'Cuz I'm gonna lose all my friends, become a nerd, and just write stories the whole day xD

Oh yeah, AND REVIEW or else I'll send Kyouya in just a tutu. xD


	6. Chapter 6

_**A/N:**_ OMG AN UPDATE D= Thanks for all the support when I said I was going to high school ^^ it really helped OwO It's been like… wow about a month… I really needa update more often o.o On the first day I was hopelessly lost because I decided to be "smart" and forgot my map . but I made lots of friends ^^

Another thing…. ONE HUNDRED REVIEWS x33 THANKS GUYS I REALLY APPRECIATE IT X333 I'll think of an award for the 100th reviewer next chappy =D

--

Haruhi was extremely ultra happy that she was actually able to live as a girl in peace and not have to act like a boy (though it was a pretty interesting experience). However, she didn't like "entertaining" boys like she was supposed to. After all, in every group of boys, there's a complete _perv_ and a stupid asshole. Not that she would know, of course, the host club hasn't even opened yet. She's just guessing.

Haruhi sighed. The doors looked like they would fall off. There was probably countless people waiting for the three minutes before opening.

"Everyone in your places please," Kyouya said.

"WAIT!" Tamaki said. "I HAVE TO GO PEE!"

"…"

"Too much information, _tono_," Kaoru said.

"Tamaki, please go do your business quickly," Kyouya said calmly.

Tamaki rushed off to the bathroom.

Hikaru smirked at Haruhi. "You ready to be beaten?"

Haruhi glared back, but didn't reply.

~two minutes later~

"WHAT IS TAKING TONO SO DAMN LONG?!?!" Hikaru said. "WE HAVE ONE MINUTE!!!" Right at that moment, they heard a flushing noise. Tamaki walked out.

"Go wash your hands," Kyouya said calmly, typing onto his laptop some more.

"Oh yeah!" Tamaki ran back into the bathroom and washed his hands. Tamaki came back out. "Sorry, I was too interested in the sewing magazines in the bathroom…"

"…okay then…"

Kyouya looked at the clock. "Five," the host club panicked, trying to get into they're places ASAP. "Four…"

"_TONO!_" Kaoru said. "YOUR ZIPPER'S DOWN!"

"WHAT?!"

"Three…" Kyouya walked calmly toward the door. Apparently, everything he does is calm.

Haruhi smoothed down her costume.

"Two," Kyouya reached for the door's handle.

"WE'RE READY!"

"One," Kyouya pulled the door open.

"_Irashaimasen~"_

--

Haruhi took a deep breath while Kyouya sorted out the appointments.

"Fujioka-san," a girl, who used to be a Haruhi fan, walked up to her and smiled warmly. "I like your costume."

"Oh," Haruhi looked at her. "Thank you!"

The girl smiled. "I hope we can become good friends."

"Okay."

It's been like that for her for a while. It was as if she was a new student in school.

She looked around her. All of the boys (minus Kyouya) had their appointments already. She watched as Tamaki entertained some girls (she was pretty sure one of them passed out just now) dressed as Zeus, king of the gods. That's right, the theme that day was Greek Mythology. Tamaki was actually supposed to be Hephaestus (ugly god xP), suggested by Hikaru and Kaoru, of course, but Tamaki objected. Hikaru and Kaoru were supposed to be Apollo and Artemis, but both refused to dress up as girls for some reason (maybe it was because of they're experience with Lobelia), so they ended up being Hermes (Kaoru) and Apollo (Hikaru), which sorta made sense to her, since Hermes and Apollo were pretty good… half siblings. Hunny was dressed as Eros (aka Cupid) and Mori was Ares (_**A/N:**_ I think it was Ares that was Eros's father, because Aphrodite had an affair with him right? o.0). Kyouya was Hades, which Haruhi thought was quite fitting, and she was Artemis. Artemis was Apollo's older twin and she wore an EXTREMELY short tunic… Yay…

"Haruhi," Hades (Kyouya) beckoned to her.

Haruhi snapped back to reality. "Huh?"

"Here is your first appointment," Kyouya motioned toward a very good looking boy, "This is Sakuraba Hiroshi-san."

The boy pushed back his brown hair and shot Haruhi a dazzling smile. "Nice to meet you, Fujioka."

"You too, H-hiroshi-kun," Haruhi forced, trying to sound cute, like Kyouya instructed. She smiled sweetly.

--

By the end of the day, Haruhi was sure of it: she should be listed as a prostitute.

See? Doesn't it make SENSE?!?! Well, in it's own way.

'Course it does.

Either way, Hikaru was the angriest he had ever been that day, with all of Haruhi's appointments. Hikaru still had the most, but that was because Haruhi was a newbie. Eventually, he knew she'd catch up.

On the other hand, Mei was at home watching the scenario on the plasma screen TV (courtesy of Hitachiin Kaoru :D) like it was a drama. And it was. What girl would miss watching this? The host club should become a TV show! (wink wink) What she liked the most was when Hikaru came over in the middle of one of Haruhi's appointments and started trying to flirt with Haruhi. Her appointment left, so Kyouya counted that action as "cheating," so he had a penalty on the competition.

Kaoru was silent most of the time, just watching. Well, he has it easy, doesn't he?

Tamaki was crying silently. But not a little bit. Do you want to see the oceans on the third music room carpet? (Say no, you'll drown.) Meanwhile, his clients started to wonder if there was a huge ass leak in the room.

Hunny was eating cakes, as usual, and Mori was supervising.

Kyouya typed… And typed… And talked to some girls… Then typed some more.

From now on, that was just a normal day. Wait 'till you see tommorow.

--

_**A/N:**_ I AM SOOO SORRY!!! Did that chapter suck? D= I'm suffering from serious writer's block right now, so I'm trying to think of a REALLY GOOD next chapter… Any suggestions? Please?

Anyway, so my 100th reviewer is… (insert drumroll here) KATARINA H.!!! Thanks soo much for reviewing x3 I'll give you a prize next chapter!

Okay, so I know I'm _really_ bad at threats but…

*takes out my old dart gun* Review or else… *points at Hikaru* he gets it.

Hikaru: O.O

Me: Yeah that's right, xD REVIEW!!!!


	7. Chapter 6 and a half

_**A/N:**_ Hi guys! I know what you're thinking: This is a real chapter.

I'm sorry to disappoint, but know. I have been totally busy, so I wrote this really short thing to show you I haven't disappeared off the face of the earth…

Okay, so for those of you who are wondering, this is a little one-shot (if I may call it that) about the Ouran characters posting "FML"s on fmylife[dot]com, which is a website where people talk about they're shit loaded day. It's actually kinda funny XD …Is it mean that I think it's funny?

--

Today, I was doing my homework, and almost finished, when two certain members thought it would be fun to play "steal the homework." While I was chasing them to get my five pages of pre-cal back, they tripped and threw it into the fireplace. FML

--

Today, during club closing hours, I was using my laptop when I was working on the budget for the next two months, I was almost done when the club president ran over with a cup of water crying about how his "daughter" was losing her innocence. He uncautiously put the cup on my laptop and tiped it over. I now have a fried laptop and two more months worth of budgets to finish. FML

--

Today, while my daughter and her "friends" were doing homework, one of them said, "This is hard." His twin replied with, "That's what she said." And my daughter laughed. When I complained about how she was loosing her innocence, she denied being my daughter. FML

--

Today, I found out that I had a chance of getting the girl I liked. However, I didn't know that she didn't like chocolate cake… Now I feel sorry for the maids that need to clean up the kitchen. FML

--

Today, when I woke up, the kitchen looked like a bomb exploded chocolate. The maids thought it was me, so now they're ignoring me. FML

--

Today, I ate my friend's chocolate cake that was originally for this girl that doesn't like chocolate cake. Then, I went to the dentist and they said I have a cavity. Now I have to put off eating sweets for two weeks… Again… FML

--

Today, I got kicked in a certain place because I was keeping a rather large cake away from my cavity-infected cousin. FML

--

_**A/N:**_ Again, I AM SUPER SORRY I HAVEN'T UPDATED!!! I will really soon! I think… 'Cause I have finals coming up… And I just typed this in half an hour… So yeah… Please review!!!

Oh yeah! And for my lucky 100th reviewer, Katarina H., I have your prize! Give me an idea for _any_ fanfic! Even if it's yaoi or yuri (though, I don't know how you'd have yuri in OHSHC.. Wait never mind…) or a pairing that's not HikaruxHaruhi or anything! When you give me the topic, I'll post it up ASAP (after I finish chapter 7) So yeah…

REVIEW MAH FRIENDS! And Merry Christmas!


	8. Chapter 7

_**A/N:**_ BOOOO! Did I scare you =D Okay so I haven't really been updating this story a lot because school is really stressful... But there was a storm where I live and the electricity in my high school went out so we got out early! Awesome, right?

--

Haruhi smiled sweetly, "Oh, Hiro-kun, you're so funny!" she added her most realistic laugh to this comment and clung onto the boy's right arm. She constantly had to remind herself "this is for the debt, this is for the debt, this is for the _debt_." "Hiro-kun" didn't seem to notice that everyone once in a while, she took a loud breath to relieve her misery.

The boy smirked and wrapped his arm around her shoulder, making her (discreetly) cringe. It wasn't that he was bad looking. Oh no! Actually, he could even become a host… If he wasn't so conceited and perverted…

Yes, the other hosts were pretty conceited. Yes, they were also perverted from time to time. But Yamamoto Hiroki made them seem modest and innocent. Even Hikaru! But this was all so that Haruhi wouldn't have a debt. So she bears with it for now.

"…Hikaru…"

"Yes, _dear brother_?" Hikaru smiled through gritted teeth. "Are you in _need_ of something?"

"Yes, the blood in my shoulder."

At this Hikaru immediately let go and muttered a soft apology before looking across the room at Haruhi and her appointment. Kaoru sighed. He had always hated those moments that they had no appointments while everyone else did. But, on second though, Haruhi was the only one with an appointment at this point. It was her last time. Kaoru didn't want to say it, but she would have more appointments than them in a flash if she was allowed to have more than one at once like everyone else. But as king of the host club (and apparently, a "worried father") she wasn't allowed to have more than one appointment at a time.

Haruhi and Yamamoto stood up and spoke a bit discreetly. Kaoru glanced to his side to see Hikaru unsuccessfully try to tune into the conversation. But as Hikaru tried to eavesdrop, Yamamoto started to leave and Haruhi waved good bye to him. Once he was out, she gave a relieved sigh.

"'_You're so funny, Hiro-kun!'_" Kaoru winced as he heard horrible mimicing from his dear brother beside him, who had a snide look on his face. "_'Hiro-kun, you're so handsome!' 'Hiro-kun is so charming!' 'Would you like me to lose my virginity for you, Hiro-kun?'"_

Haruhi pulled the long wig off her head and shook her head, as if trying to shake something off. Her hair was now up to the middle of her neck. Haruhi finished and glared at Hikaru. "I didn't say the last one."

Hikaru jumped over the back of the couch and walked up to her. "It looked like it."

Haruhi returned his glare, looking up into his green eyes. "_'_Ohime-sama,_ you are so beautiful.' 'If I didn't have Kaoru, then you would be the one I'd fall for.'"_ Haruhi bared her teeth and him and flicked his forehead.

He rubbed his forehead for a minute and watched her as she walked away. He made no effort to follow her and just slumped down on the couch.

"_Damn it!"_ Kaoru winced again and held a hand to his left ear. "_I WANNA SEE MORE DRAMA!_"

Kyouya gave Kaoru a quick look. Kaoru nodded and the moved to the back of the room while Tamaki fussed over Haruhi and Hikaru was too stressed to notice. Honey-sempai and Mori-sempai left to practice kendo already, so they were good,HarH

"Mei-san," Kyouya said discreetly, "Please be careful, Tamaki almost heard you there."

"Well, _so~rry!_" Kaoru smiled at her sarcastic apology and looked over at Hikaru to check on him.

Still gloating. He's fine.

"I just wanted to see some action!" Kaoru tuned back into the conversation and slouched against the wall. There was a short pause, then he heard "get it out-get it out-get it out!" from his earpiece.

"…That's what she said," Kyouya said. Kaoru gasped (quietly) and Mei froze.

"Actually, I was watching _Animal Planet._ They're trying to rescue a baby deer from a pond."

"I'm sorry?" Kyouya asked as if he had no idea what she was talking about. "Did I say something?"

"…" Oh he's good.

Kyouya stopped writing on the clipboard for a minute and paused. Kaoru glanced at him, trying to see if he could read his expresions. He was unsuccessful.

Suddenly, Kyouya looked up and walked back towards everyone else. Kaoru tilted his head questioningly to the side, but followed him.

"Haruhi, what did Yamamoto-san ask before leaving?"

Haruhi unscrewed her water bottle cap and shrugged. "He asked me on a date," she lifted the bottle to her lips and took a sip before closing it again.

Kyouya pushed up his glasses and wrote something down before looking back up at Haruhi. "Did you happen to reply to his request?"

Haruhi set the bottle down on the table. "Nope. I told him I'd think about it. Should I have rejected it?"

Kyouya looked back down at his clipboard, "Actually, no. Next time, please agree to any date requests."

Haruhi's eyes widened, "WHAT?!"

Hikaru imitated this act. Kaoru just stared in shock.

"_Kyouya! Are you mental?!_" Kaoru heard the sound of something dropping on the floor in Mei's house before she started shouting at him.

"That way, if I'm correct, we could possibly get more customers for you. If it goes around that you are accepting actual dates, more boys will come and make more appointments to ask you to spend some time outside of school with them," Kyouya said this as nonchalantly as any person possibly could.

"In other words," Hikaru said through gritted teeth. "You want other guys to get the impression that she's _easy?!_"

"_WHAT ARE YOU? VOLDEMORT?! 'CAUSE YOU'RE JUST AS EVIL AS HIM!_" Mei screamed this loudly into their ears and Kaoru had to resist the urge to pull it out of his ear. But he was just as surprised as all of them. How would this help further their relationship?

"Kyouya-sempai!" Haruhi balled her hands into a fist. "This is the _last straw!_"

Kyouya handed his clipboard to Kaoru and raised a hand in his defense. "Don't worry, this _is_ the last odd request I will make of you. However, this _is_ for your benefit so that you can pay off your debt. And, don't forget, after this you are free to do whatever you like."

Haruhi looked angrier than Kaoru had ever seen her, "Damn straight. Once I'm done with my debt, I'm outta here."

Hikaru suddenly looked crestfallen and Kaoru felt a stab of sadness as he watched Haruhi pack up her stuff in an angry manner. She was right. Once she was done with her debt, she'd be gone.

A flushing noise came from the bathroom and some running water sound from the sink came on, then off twenty seconds later. Tamaki came out to the main room of the Third Music room and smiled. "Your king is back! What did I miss?"

Everyone growled at him, Kaoru included. Kaoru walked toward Hikaru and placed a hand on his shoulder. Hikaru waved off his hand and walked to his book bag.

"I'm going to go home early," he said without looking up. "I'll just go comatose for a few hours, have wild hallucinations, then wake up not remembering any of it." Hikaru walked out the door and into the hallway straight ahead of the room.

"…What?" Tamaki tilted his head to the side, unaware of the atmosphere.

"That means he's going to sleep, dumbass!" Haruhi slung her book bag over her shoulder and followed Hikaru out the door, but turned left as soon as she left the room.

Tamaki stared, "There's something wrong, isn't there?"

"No shit!" Kaoru growled. He sat down on the couch and tried facepalming with his left hand, but instead of his palm, his forehead met some paper on a block of wood. He remembered that Kyouya had given him the clipboard. Kaoru glanced down at the notes Kyouya was making. He could make out the small, but neat handwriting: _Jealousy may cause Hikaru to become more overprotective of Haruhi and this may, unless my calculations are wrong, cause them to develop their feelings better_. Kaoru realized the brilliance of this plan and stared down at the small note, reading it over and over. Then he noticed something at the bottom right corner of the paper. In extrememly small letters, he read _Ninjas pwn Pirates_.

Kaoru looked up to search for Kyouya, but only saw his back as he left the room. Kaoru was pretty sure that Kyouya had noticed him, because Kyouya had lifted his hand as if to say good-bye.

"_Kaoru, what does it say?_" Mei whispered into his ear.

Kaoru looked at Tamaki, who was still in shock and looking down at the ground. "I'll tell you later."

--

_**A/N:**_ How was that? I tried my best . Next chapter will probably be longer. At least, that's what I'm hoping… =/ Anyways…

Look

It's a magical button

If you click it, then dinosaurs will come to life

l

l

V


	9. Important AN!

_**IMPORTANT A/N!!!!!**_

Okay, for those of you who clicked on this thinking it was a new chapter, I am so so _so_ sorry! I truly am! But recently, I've noticed that with so many fanfics planned and started (ahahaha… I have a lot of idea explosions…) it's really hard to keep track of them all and update. So I'm going to start prioritizing my fanfics so that it's easier to finish them.

The list goes as follows:

_Of Cats and New Students_ (Soul Eater)

The Gift Fic for Sporkie (TWEWY) If you don't know who Sporkie is, look up grawrgrawrninja

_This is NOT Mine_ (Shugo Chara!)

_Someone's Hair is Growing Longer_ (Ouran High School Host Club)

_Seven Souls _(Soul Eater)

_Operation: Romance of my Dreams_ (Gakuen Alice)

_World is Theirs_ (Soul Eater)

_All the World Needs is Us_ (TWEWY)

_The Ultimate Soul Eater Guide Book _(Guess which anime)

And I'll also have some planned fanfics coming up, including the intended three-shot that I showed everyone in _Seven Souls_ and the prize fic for _Someone's Hair is Growing Longer_'s hundreth reviewer, Katarina H. So bare with me guys. I am really really really really really really really really really sorry!

I'll be updating everything every once in a while, but not very often. After I finish number three on the priority list, everything will go back to normal... That is, until I start procrastinating again…

So I'm REALLY REALLY SORRY! DX I feel really bad! But it must be done! I'll get through this as fast as I can so you can all get your wanted updates! So here I end my announcement =( I'm still sorry! DX


	10. Announcement!

_**ANOUNCEMENT!**_

For those of you who actually follow my fanfics, I'm sorry to say that I'm leaving this account and planning on starting fresh at some point. I feel like there's just no motivation with this account and I want to start anew in order to sort things out and move on from past fandoms. Therfore, I will be discontinuing many of the fanfics on here. Sorry

However, if time allows it, I will be continuing some fics such as _Eighth __Time__'__s __a __Charm_ and completely rewriting a fic or two, like _The __Piratical __Adventures __of __Alice __Kirkland_, although it probably won't have the same title anymore.

I hope you guys understand! :) Thanks for the run, I really appreciated it! I might post a link to my new account once I make it, so yeah. It was nice to have you guys reading my stories, and I hope I see some of you on my new account!


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